Be You. Be Limitless. | Speaker - Humorist - Author | Karith Foster
  • Who is Karith Foster?
    • Speaker
    • Humorist
    • Author
    • Watch Now
  • Perfect or Happy
  • Booking
  • Press Kit
  • Contact

Bubble Girl

10/29/2009

Comments

 
Karith Foster as a Child
When I was a little girl I had many instances where I thought I was being wronged or getting the short end of the stick. I know, you’re probably thinking who would intentionally rob such a sweet little brown girl of her joie de vivre? Well, let me tell you, I promise the answer will shock and awe you.

When I was 4 years old I couldn’t blow a bubble to save my life. So it soon became the mission of all the neighborhood kids in our quaint close-knit suburb to help little Karith Foster blow her first bubble. We did everything—after pre-k tutorials, weekend workshops in the clubhouse – but nothing worked. My friends were disheartened and I was devastated. I thought there was something seriously wrong with me. Or as we say in Texas, that I was “special.” Well, turns out, that wasn’t the case; nor was it the case of my friends being incompetent teachers. It seems that Yours Truly was attempting to blow gorgeous masterful bubbles with the only product my mother would allow me to chew. Nope, I didn’t have access to Bubble Yum, Double Bubble or Hubba Bubba like the other kids had.

Nooo! Un-uh! I had a piddly teeny-weeny tiny piece of the gum that 4 out of 5 dentists recommend. That’s right I had sugar-free, cavity-fighting, spearmint-flavored Trident. And that tiny piece of gum gave me a complex for years! Years I tell you!

A little piece of happy my ass! Now I’m not casting blame. I get it. My mother, who I love dearly and who loves me more than chocolate, was trying to be a “good mom.” But I think we all know that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Her loving attempt to keep me cavity free instigated much more psychological distress than a visit to the dentist for a few fillings ever would have caused. You want to know the sick twisted part of all of this? I actually liked going to the dentist as a kid.

Still do to this day. I’m not saying it’s natural, but if lying in an overly well lit office with my mouth held unnaturally wide open while someone with a medical degree scrapes, pokes and prods my gums all in the name of dental hygiene is wrong—then gosh darn it! I don’t want to be right!

Comments
    Picture

    Karith Foster: Humorist, TV Radio Personality, Speaker, Author

    Karith Foster is a stand-up comedian, motivational speaker, TV & radio personality, actress, author, blogger and entrepreneur.

    Booking!

    Karith Foster's Topics of Laughter

    All
    Allergic To Chocolate
    American Loggers
    Asian Co-worker
    Barack Obama
    Barfight
    Black Co-worker
    Blowing A Bubble
    Carbon Footprint
    Chinese Gymnast
    Comedian Videos
    Comedic Rant
    Comedy Videos
    Corporate America
    Corporate Comedian
    Countess
    Cross Country Universal Truths
    Discovery Network
    Diversity
    Driving Etiquette
    Ellen Degeneres
    Executive Leadership Skills
    Fantasy Football
    Fantasy Politics
    Fidelity
    Finders Keepers
    Forever Young
    Garden Gnome
    Green Card
    Halloween Costumes
    Handcuff Lady
    Harry Potter
    How To Be A Successful Comedian
    Imus
    Inner Child
    Karaoke
    Kardashian Costume
    Karith Foster
    Las Vegas Comedy
    Latino Executive
    Madonna
    Mailing Dog Poop
    Mamafest Destiny Syndrome
    Men I Date List
    Michael Jackson
    Monogamy
    Monsters Inside Me
    Mormon
    Oxygen
    Pedicure
    PETA
    Public Restrooms
    Respectable Comedian
    R. Kelly
    Texas Vs New York
    The Deadliest Catch
    Things Not To Say
    Tiger Woods
    Toddlers
    Vajayjay Vacation
    Vanessa Williams
    Vegetarians
    Winermobile
    Working Moms

    RSS Feed

COMMUNICATION - ACCEPTANCE - RESPECT - ENGAGEMENT

Humorist
Speaker
Author
Radio/TV Personality
Privacy Policy
Press Kit
Karith Foster | Waking Girl Web Design
  • Who is Karith Foster?
    • Speaker
    • Humorist
    • Author
    • Watch Now
  • Perfect or Happy
  • Booking
  • Press Kit
  • Contact