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Finders Keepers

2/2/2009

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Remember that crazy Long Island doctor—the one who wanted his kidney back after his wife filed for divorce.  Well, turns out he’s not the only dude who’s sorry he was so generous. 28 yr. old Thomas Lee Rowley also felt entitled to get something back he gave his girlfriend. Not a ring, not an organ, not even the gift that keeps on giving—nope, he wanted her boobs. ‘Cause apparently he paid for them. Yeah, well, cry me a river “Mr.-More-Than-a-Handful-Isn’t-Enough”. But guess what?! She paid for ‘em too. All those times she went to a muscle car show instead of the mall with her friends. Every time she dealt with “man hair” in the bathroom. Every time you “dutch-ovened” her… Every time she said “Honey, size doesn’t matter” and acted like she meant it. She was paying for HER tah-tas too. Let’s be honest—odds are she wasn’t just gettin’ em’ for herself. And Dude, even if she was you directly benefited. I have no doubt she let you take the puppies out of the sweater park every now and then.

Think about it! Even if you got the implants back you realize the most you could do with them is play a really close game of hacky sack, maybe have some cool new agey cup holders (no pun intended). I know have a tendency for being too subtle so let me put it this way…If they’re in her body- by whatever name you call’em, boobs, knockers, fun bags, perky pecs they’re hers now. So hands off.  Finders keeper! You want a set of tits so bag get your bad buns on the next flight to Brazil and call Dr. Diaz my friend Gregory, I mean, Ginny- says he’s fabulous!

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    Karith Foster: Speaker, Humorist, Author

    Karith Foster is a stand-up comedian, motivational speaker, TV & radio personality, actress, author, blogger and entrepreneur.

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